Bridal-Preparation Prayer

TRUST

Lord my only prayer right now is "TEACH ME HOW TO TRUST " , i was wondering why is it so hard for me to trust . Well for starters fear is the thing that grips me so much and basically paralyses my ability to trust . Todays society and world has become so much more demonic that now men are battling with their flesh in the world and even in the church . Women have turned so far from modesty , that these men are falling short and we know the Lord says in Matthew 5:28 "Anyone that looks over a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart ".

As a young woman striving towards perfection with hopes of being married soon , it scares me because i WANT  to be the only woman that my husband lusteth after or only has desires for or look upon , but out there in this world the men have to constantly fight with the help of the Holy Spirit not to lust .

I have so much more to write on this but all i can think is "Lord I am terribly scared please God teach me how to trust and in trusting teach me how to trust in you that I will always know that you will  take care of me ". I know that i will trust in you continually and i will trust in the man of god you have placed in my life :-) .... all fear is gone

MY YOKE IS EASY AND MY BURDEN IS LIGHT

"MY YOKE IS EASY AND MY BURDEN LIGHT" , I read this verse and I thought to myself Jesus if it is so light why am i facing all these problems , why is it so difficult , why am i feeling like I just cant go on ... am i a transgressor because PROVERBS 13:15  says " but the way of transgressors is hard" , but transgressors do not know Christ so that can't be it .

I did some reading and i realize this walk was so hard for numerous reasons . Firstly I made it hard , I made it hard when i refuse to surrender my all to God . There are times when i try to deal with everything on my own , where i try to rise above situations and circumstances without even consulting and giving all to my Heavenly Father and then you know what I fail miserably because my flesh can only do so much and there i am fighting when i am quenching my spirit man .

In 2 Corinthians chapter 4 verses 8 - 10 it says "We are troubled on every side, yet not distressed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; cast down, but not destroyed; Always bearing about in the body the dying of the Lord Jesus, [so] that the life also of Jesus might be made manifest in our body....". 

And then i realize i was being distressed, i was in despair, i was forsaking myself, i felt like i was being destroyed and that was because I did not surrender all to my God , i do not lay down my life so that God can  manifest His through me, no wonder i feel as though i am being consumed and then i ask God please help me i don't know what to do when the first thing I should do is "SURRENDER"   . And this is a harsh reality . 

Secondly the lack of self discipline is one of the causes to this walk being so hard and the meaning of self discipline is this "the training and controlling of ones self for personal improvement ". When situations arise and we decide not to die to self and do as Christ does it actually shows that we are not disciplined enough , so many times I am faced with a decision and do you know I choose my flesh and go on feelings , but this Spirit walk is not based on feelings but its based on the Word of God . I know sometimes it seems so easy to ride that wave of emotion and after we act outside the will of God and we choose emotions over truth , it results in shame and despair and regret.. Ahhhh I know about that but I have decided to ask the Lord to fill me with the  discipline to die to self and pick up my cross and count the cost . 

Thirdly FAITH  is a next reason so many of us lack faith or when we start off hot and sweaty with faith and then that suddenly dies and we become melancholy, desperate you name it . But faith is the substance of things hoped for , the evidence of things not seen. And if we cant have faith in what Gods word says means we are not having faith in God and we are calling him a liar . We cannot see the Lord but we have faith that he is who he says he is and we believe in his word . So we are actually making the Lord seem small when our faith fails. We are his children and we need to push past everything in our lives and hold on to the Lord knowing that he knows best and he will take care of us and bring us through , because we are precious to him . I mean he says in Matthew chapter 6 verses 26 "Behold the fowls of the air , for they sow not , neither so they reap , nor gather into barns , yet your Heavenly Father feedeth them . Are ye not much better than they?". Also look at verse 30 30 “If that is how God clothes the grass of the fields, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you , O you of little faith?”. So the Lord wants to know that we are walking in faith also one more stunning thing to me is that the Lord blessed Abraham for his faith J but that’s a next talk. Ah Lord makes me who you want me to be J

So no matter what is going on in our lives, how bad it may seem, the Lord has given us the firm authority to lay down our lives so that he can be made manifest in and through our lives, and this is where the kind of faith we have will play its part, faith to allow Jesus to carry our burdens and make our yokes light by trusting in him forever more. Thank you Jesus

Sometimes its so hard but Glory be to God

I have neglected to write and so much have been happening in these past few months that i did not even have the zeal to write. Firstly when i came to Christ i never thought this was where my problems will start but the scripture was right when it was said in 2 Timothy " Yea and all that will live godly in Christ Jesus shall suffer persecution" and also to quote 1 Peter chapter 1 :6,7 " Wherein ye greatly rejoice ,though, now for a season , if need be, ye are in heaviness through manifold temptations. That the trial of your faith , being much more precious than gold that perisheth, though it be tried with fire ,might be found unto praise and honor and glory at the appearing of Jesus Christ". And we know Jesus was not exempted from temptations because we know after he was baptized the spirit of the Lord sent him to the wilderness where he was tempted of the devil (Matthew chapter 4), and he overcame through prayer and faith in his Father , and likewise he has made provision for us to overcome as well.


Sometimes it seems as though God is so far from us when we are going through our wilderness experiences because we want help NOW  or we want God to work NOW or we want to cop out but this is what trial produces ... It produces FAITH, LONG-SUFFERING, FAITHFULNESS TO GOD , ENDURANCE, HUMBLENESS.  Trials makes you see how the flesh is so weak , how we sin and fall short , how much we second guess our Lord and we can't go on without him . We will die if we leaned onto our own understanding but sometimes it seems so hard to let God take care of things , because, the flesh in us wants to take care of things on our own in a way that is quicker and indeed selfish . At that point in time we are telling God " umm you are kinda moving to slow and i really need to fix this , so ill help you out ".


And that draws me to another point we are so selfish its always what "I" want , sometimes we are afraid to say "Lord if it is your will , because sometimes his will may not be what you want and so hope to cling unto " . Even within myself i am selfish , i am selfish to God i say "GIMME GIMME GIMME and i give him less than he deserves ,sometimes i don't even want to give him at all. I am selfish in my relationship with my sweetie pie Marc ,sometimes i think how i will benefit not even caring that the other person is not benefiting. 


It so hard when through trials and through this walk with God that he brings our faults to the surface, faults you didn't even know was there lurking behind the scenes , faults people might pick up on and judge you by, faults that separates.. Faults that bring you to your knees and you have nothing else to do but to cry out "LORD PLEASE CHANGE ME " . But if you desire and require of the Lord to change you and you have given up those faults and have repented and have asked the Lord to show you how to be and what to do , then you are no longer governed by your faults, but I don't think we were ever governed by our faults being in Christ Jesus . Most times we condemn ourselves so much and look at ourselves through the eyes of people , so we actually start believing what they say about us . But if we are constantly  having to die to self and  having to renew our mind and our spirit then we are not what they say we are because we all fall short and we are not govern by our mistakes or our pasts we are govern by the Holy Spirit , So it comes down to 'WHOSE REPORT WE WILL BELIEVE MAN OR THE LORDS". Lord i will believe your report help me to stand strong on your word . Amen

LAYING IN WEIGHT HMM I MEAN WAIT

It is true, totally true that a relationship without GOD / JESUS CHRIST will only have sin in it. When you know Jesus Christ and you have him at the centre then we are able to conquer and put the flesh under submission and love each other the way Christ love us . Courting is a beautiful thing but sometimes we can make it ugly and sinful, not the way its suppose to be just to fulfill fleshly desires that’s all it is fleshly desires. For me and my soon to be youth husband that is one battle the devil thinks he is going to conquer but boy is he fooling himself . The Lord has been so good to us that he reminds us when we are doing too much and when i mean too much i don't mean fornication but every hug counts you know. I often wonder how others have conquered that aspect of their courting , i mean we are not the traditional parents go out with you kind of couple , so we really have to lean on the Lord, and the DESIRE  to be married to each other  is getting stronger , it’s getting stronger with every prayer, every smile, every laugh, every moment, every trial, every day i just want to scream because this love is consuming me it’s so much love my cup is spilling over with love  . I want to be that virtuous woman that God has called me to be , i want to take care of him and our household, be wise in the Lord, reverencing the Lord , becoming a woman after Gods heart.

Epilogue: The Wife of Noble Character

 ^10 [b]A wife of noble character who can find? 
   She is worth far more than rubies. 
¹¹ Her husband has full confidence in her 
   and lacks nothing of value. 
¹² She brings him good, not harm, 
   all the days of her life. 
¹³ She selects wool and flax 
   and works with eager hands. 
¹⁴ She is like the merchant ships, 
   bringing her food from afar. 
¹⁵ She gets up while it is still night; 
   she provides food for her family 
   and portions for her female servants. 
¹⁶ She considers a field and buys it; 
   out of her earnings she plants a vineyard. 
¹⁷ She sets about her work vigorously; 
   her arms are strong for her tasks. 
¹⁸ She sees that her trading is profitable, 
   and her lamp does not go out at night. 
¹⁹ In her hand she holds the distaff 
   and grasps the spindle with her fingers. 
²⁰ She opens her arms to the poor 
   and extends her hands to the needy. 
²¹ When it snows, she has no fear for her household; 
   for all of them are clothed in scarlet. 
²² She makes coverings for her bed; 
   she is clothed in fine linen and purple. 
²³ Her husband is respected at the city gate, 
   where he takes his seat among the elders of the land. 
²⁴ She makes linen garments and sells them, 
   and supplies the merchants with sashes. 
²⁵ She is clothed with strength and dignity; 
   she can laugh at the days to come. 
²⁶ She speaks with wisdom, 
   and faithful instruction is on her tongue. 
²⁷ She watches over the affairs of her household 
   and does not eat the bread of idleness. 
²⁸ Her children arise and call her blessed; 
   her husband also, and he praises her: 
²⁹ “Many women do noble things, 
   but you surpass them all.” 
³⁰ Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; 
   but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. 
³¹ Honor her for all that her hands have done, 
   and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

And this is the woman I desire to be!!!!!!!!!!!!! We are waiting on the Lord but sometimes its feels like we are WEIGHTING  ... But we have made a stand for holiness and righteousness and pure unadulterated love and sometimes we may become too consume in each other and that’s when the enemy sets the bait for us but we have to remember to......  "WATCH AND PRAY LEST YE FALL INTO TEMPTATION” 

Oh Lord I pray you make a way for us, I can’t wait to be next to him to be Mrs. Nelson to be his FINALLY.

I can only wait and lean upon God , praying the Lord take my desires because I’m not going to lie I am human and yes sex is a beautiful act by God it’s a form of worship that is only consecrated for MARRIAGE , and we intend to wait till marriage . A one minute or a onetime sin is not worth it, it’s not worth what God has put together, and I believe sometimes US as GOD'S people can definitely at times mess up Gods plan for us or delay it. 

BUT I DECLARE THAT MY SOON TO BE YOUTH HUSBAND AND I WILL LAY IN WAIT AND WE WILL WAIT PATIENTLY AND KEEP OURSELVES CLEAN HOLY PURE AND ACCEPTABLE UNTO GOD, THAT HE WILL BLESS US ABUNDANTLY AND CONTINUE TO BE THE CENTER OF OUR RELATIONSHIP AS WE CONTINUE TO GROW IN HIM AND WITH EACH OTHER, LOVING EACH OTHER AS CHRIST LOVES US AND AS WE LOVE THE LORD :-)

For the trials and blessings ahead i am ready , I am ready to completely depend upon the Lord , to completely love this man that God has given me , ready to be his support , ready to watch and pray so we will NEVER  fall into temptation , ready to do away with every fleshly desire , ready to place his feelings and his being above mine , ready to take care of this wonderful man, ready to love him unconditionally, ready to start a life with my love , ready to be the couple God has called us to be a couple for Christ , READY !!!!!!!!!!!!! I AM JUST READY 

I AM VALUABLE BUT NOT BY WORLDLY STANDARDS

In life i have come to realize that people have different standards placed on you to accomplish and when you divert or you don't totally measure up to their expectations they class you as a failure . And sometimes we struggle with the thought of being useless and a failure and not being able to amount to anything . You know those days where you watch people prosper  even  the WICKED prospering and you catching your A to Z to just make it as a born again believer in Christ . 

But i heard these words and i took them and placed them in my heart " Don't for a minute let people predict or tell you about YOUR future because it's not what they say and what they want but its about what JESUS says because my future is fully secured in the Lord.We just need to continue walking in the Lord , being faithful ,holy and righteous and he will grant us our hearts desires and he will open doors for us and bless us immensely.

VALUABLE

I am valuable to God , when people class you as a failure ,Jesus sees you as a valuable gem , i mean come on he has grafted you in , he has made you in his image and likeness ,he WOKE  you up ... and thats enough!!!! the mere fact he woke you up was because your work is not finished he still has a purpose for your life ! I need to always have a reminder of that at times . 

I am constantly being pressured by my family to reach up to par with my cousins who are abroad studying and here i was struggling in university and having to stay out of the system for a year .... yes a whole year.... hmm well you could imagine how that just crushed the family members who placed education above everything . But God had a different part for me , he needed to take me out of the environment that so easily was used by the devil to consume me ....... he had a plan ... a plan that i never would have thought i would have been journeying on to this very day , but he called me and he changed my course for his honor and his glory !!!! I only want his will to be done not mine and I've realised that man make their plans but God DEFINITELY has the FINAL say . So i am trusting God to take me where he wants me to go its okay if i am the black sheep or the person classed off as a failure , i pray Jesus uses me and at the end of my journey he will say "Well done my good and faithful servant ".

This life is temporary we are just vessels placed on this earth to worship the Lord and to prepare ourselves for what is to come after we die  .....to repent, accept salvation , live holy and blameless before HIM . So the cars, the money, the positions in society , the clothes , the degrees at the end of it really counts for  NOTHING .

I desire to be a virtuous , God fearing woman who lives holy and righteous in the eyes of my Lord . So only Jesus words count and he says that  I AM  MORE VALUABLE AND USEFUL THAN I THINK... THANK YOU LORD JESUS :-)

YAYYYY MY FIRST BLOG ... I DECIDED TO START MY OWN BLOG ON THE 29 TH MAY BECAUSE I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS PLUS I DESIRE TO SPEAK TO YOUNG WOMEN WHOSE LIVES ARE FOR JESUS CHRIST  LIVING HOLY AND RIGHTEOUS BEFORE HIM  REJECTING THIS WORLD AND ACCEPTING CHRIST.................. SO I 'M OFF TO CHURCH BUT...... CANT WAIT FOR MORE TO COME :-) HAVE A BLESSED SUNDAY